Hey gang, quick question for you before we delve into today’s makeover …
I am speaking at an “etiquette night” for the youth in our church; specifically on dining etiquette. I know that’s not the most thrilling topic to discuss with teenagers, so my plan is to try and keep things as entertaining as possible. I’m looking for a few dining etiquette horror stories to share in the hopes of making them laugh, while sneakily teaching them about manners at the same time. They’ll never suspect a thing.
Here’s an example of what I’m talking about from a woman who offered to take a date out to a nice restaurant on his birthday. She says, “The drinks came and one of them spilled on the table. He stopped the waitress from wiping it up and proceeded to slurp it off of the table and said ‘These drinks ain’t cheap!’ Then he spent the rest of the night on his phone.”
Hahahilarious! And a fine example of what NEVER to do.
Anyway, if you have any dining/bad manners horror stories to share in the comments, now is your chance. Or just even your worst date stories, because even though that won’t help me at all, those are my faaaaaavorite.
And now, I hope your manners are in check, because this kitchen makeover by Elisha at Pneumatic Addict might make you drool.
Although in some cultures, it’s actually considered polite to drool over a stunning kitchen makeover. That signals to the owner that you are very impressed with their workmanship and also a little bit jealous. Just be sure to wipe up after yourself.
46 Comments
Kimberly
February 16, 2016 at 7:07 AMWhen my son was small, I took every opportunity to teach manners. He was never allowed to be rude about anything that was placed before him. If he didn’t like a dish, and we were away from home, he could only say “No thank you” to seconds and not to comment on the offensiveness. One day when we were on our way to eat for the first time with elderly friends, I coached all the way there, be thankful, use you manners and DO NOT say anything is gross. When we were seated and the lady brought out hamburgers to her elegant table (no doubt in thoughtful concession to my 4 year old), my son excitedly announced “Hamburgers! I LOVE hamburgers!” to the delight of our hosts. Then he said, “Mom! You thought they would have GROSS food, but they have HAMBURGERS!!”
Lindsey @ Better After
February 16, 2016 at 2:25 PMHahaha, I bet you wanted to crawl under the table! My daughter did something kind of like that to me once, she had just made friends with a cute little pair of sisters. Their mom invited us to the park for a playdate, and before we got there I said “PLEASE don’t say anything about your birthday party tomorrow.” I was planning a super small party with just a few friends and wasn’t prepared to invite any more guests, especially since I hadn’t even met these kids and their mom until literally right then at the park. Sure enough, guess what she bleats out as we are leaving the playdate, “I’M HAVING A BIRTHDAY PARTY TOMORROW BUT MY MOM SAID YOU CAN’T COME.” Me: stammering like an idiot, wanting to crawl in a hole and die.
Christine
February 16, 2016 at 7:51 AMThis didn’t happen to me, but to my sister in law. In college, she attended an etiquette dinner. Her school had a large portion of Agricultural students. For dessert, they were served creme brulee. After finishing dessert, the presenter asked if anyone had any questions. One of the male attendees raised his hand and asked “Do y’all have any more of that burnt puddin? It was real good.” Needless to say, my sister in law about DIED laughing!
Nelly
February 16, 2016 at 7:53 AMTwo stories, one mine, one my sister’s.
My story: I went on a date with a guy. Movie and then dinner. We got pizza. It was very cheesy messy pizza. It was good. I would take a bite and then use my napkin after each bite. He kept laughing at me. He would say, “Napkins are for after you’re done eating.” “Napkins are for clean up.” He was a greasy mess by the end, licking his fingers. ick
Sister’s story: She was away at college. A guy asked her to go on a picnic with him. They drove up into the mountains and picked a spot. He brought two packages of hot dogs … and nothing else. No plates. No buns. No nothing. She ate one raw hot dog. He ate the rest.
Lindsey @ Better After
February 16, 2016 at 2:13 PMHAHAHAHA, I’m literally laughing out loud at the one raw hot dog! Picnic etiquette, what not to serve.
Melanie
February 16, 2016 at 8:02 AMAh, love a white kitchen. I really like the countertops too. Big difference from before.
Lil
February 16, 2016 at 8:51 AMFriend’s story: Boyfriend coming to dinner to meet the parents. Mom was, to say the least, not the laid back type at dinner, more of the 10 forks and 4 glasses at your place setting type. Boyfriend had a cold. Blew his nose, at the table, into her mom’s linen napkins. And then proceeded to pour himself wine, over and over again, pretty much hogging the whole (apparently very good) bottle. Boyfriend was fired.
Lindsey @ Better After
February 16, 2016 at 2:10 PMWow! And at a special ‘meet the parents’ dinner too! That’s one way to make an impression!
Carol Hake
February 16, 2016 at 9:26 AMLove this kitchen!
My mom always taught me to order modestly when on a date to a restaurant to avoid embarrassing your date. A good friend took a girl out on their first date. We told him to take her to the nicest restaurant he could afford, and on a college student’s budget it was fairly modest. What he didn’t know was that they had lobster as the special that night. The girl ordered the lobster, the most expensive thing on the menu. He gulped and ordered a dinner salad and water. She ate the entire meal while he slowly ate his lettuce. Then she wondered why he didn’t call her for a second date!
Lindsey @ Better After
February 16, 2016 at 2:09 PMOh! Haha, how sad, but you described it so funny! I’m picturing him trying slowly to make his lettuce last through her multiple course meal! No wonder he didn’t ask her out again!
Lisa
February 16, 2016 at 9:28 AMOk – this was a blind date. I met a guy at a restaurant for dinner that had cut himself shaving. He kept dabbing at his chin but couldn’t stop the bleeding so half way through dinner he ripped off a piece of napkin and stuck it to his face. So I had to look at that for the rest of the night. Needless to say I didn’t see him again.
Lindsey @ Better After
February 16, 2016 at 2:07 PMUgh, talk about losing your appetite!! I kinda feel bad for the guy, but at the same time, surely there must have been a better solution! Figure out something else dude!
W J
February 16, 2016 at 10:24 AMOk. I love the look of the little square cabinets on top of the uppers, but can someone tell me if these are 8 foot or 9 foot ceilings? Will that work with 8 foot ceilings?
Lindsey @ Better After
February 16, 2016 at 2:06 PMI think it would, as long as you had space above the cupboards. I’ve seen people even create fake cabinets there, just for the look. It makes such a bigger impact!
Odette
February 16, 2016 at 10:54 AMMy mother took me and my then boyfriend out to dinner. Afterwards, he lifted his shirt and patted his belly, exclaiming over the good meal. My mother was HORRIFIED! I married him anyway, and we’re about to celebrate our 40th anniversary in April.
Lindsey @ Better After
February 16, 2016 at 2:05 PMI love that this one has a happy ending! Did he continue his habit of bare-belly patting after a great meal?? Too funny.
Janet
February 16, 2016 at 11:49 AMI have a sort-of-date story. When I was a teenager my older sister and I were at the a carnival that had traveled into town. We were just hanging out with no intention of going on any overpriced rides. A couple guys walked up to us and asked us if we wanted to go on a ride. I started to say no but she elbowed me and said yes. They walked away to buy tickets as she explained to me that if they ask us, they’ll be buying our tickets. The 2 guys came back and both handed a ticket to her. (I wasn’t unattractive, she was considered very pretty. Whatever, she was just my sister to me). Awkward. No one said anything and after a few seconds one guy reluctantly handed his ticket to me. I got him back by having super long, thick hair that proceeded to whip him in the face for the entire ride.
Lindsey @ Better After
February 16, 2016 at 2:03 PMOh man, teen boys are in a class of their own!
Patty
February 16, 2016 at 12:17 PMMy sons were brought up with “good” china, “good” silver etc. They were taught which fork to use, what to do with your napkin, etc. etc. etc. When my eldest went to work in NYC he went to the Company Christmas Party at a very fancy hotel. He said everyone looked around and didn’t know what to do. He said he sat down, took his napkin and used the correct cutlery. He actually came home and thanked me for teaching him that. It was worth it!
Lindsey @ Better After
February 16, 2016 at 12:48 PMThat’s fantastic! I bet his bosses were impressed too!
Charlotte
February 16, 2016 at 12:18 PMMy sister’s first and worst date was the prom. I cut and pasted her description from her blog:
My date was a respectable gentleman: nice, cute, and had good lineage. Let’s just say picking me up for the date was probably the highlight of his entire evening. There was nothing wrong with him, the group we went with, or the dance itself, other than I just wanted to go home and go to bed. I was completely out of my element and I didn’t like it. I knew the plans were to go to someone’s house after the dance and watch a movie. Sitting close to a boy on a couch during a 2 hour movie sounded like getting a cavity filled, so I lied. I said that my parents told me I had to be home by midnight. I saw the disappointment in his face, not because he wanted my company, because it is embarrassing to show up to the after-party without your date.
He pulled into my driveway and delivered the line I deserved and the line that would give my sister and I non-stop laughs for the next 12 years.
“Date’s over, get your own door.”
And I did. Gladly.
Lindsey @ Better After
February 16, 2016 at 12:50 PMDate’s over, get your own door! Ha ha! I could see a line like that living on in infamy.
Emily
February 16, 2016 at 12:55 PMThis is a story from a friend, who had just returned to the workforce after being home with her sons for several years. She had a client lunch at a very nice steakhouse, and the man she was lunching with got up right after the food was delivered to use the restroom. When he returned, he found his steak had been cut up into little tiny kid-sized pieces. My friend was HORRIFIED – apparently she had just zoned out for a second and did what she always did when she was out with her kids: CUT UP THEIR FOOD. She apologized profusely – I guess the guy had kids too and found it kind of funny. (But it still would have been absolutely MORTIFYING.) I don’t think that teaches any kind of etiquette lesson except KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF, but there you go. 🙂
Lindsey @ Better After
February 16, 2016 at 2:01 PMOh my gosh! HILARIOUS! That’s so funny she just went into auto-pilot mom-mode! HAHAHA!
Laura
February 16, 2016 at 12:56 PMThat kitchen is amazing! I love your blog!
Worst date story I can come up with: A guy friend of mine picked up his date and took her to a nice, expensive dinner. He said everything was very tense and she gave no effort to have a conversation at any point in the evening. After they finished their dinner, she took out her earring at the table and used the earring post to clean in-between her teeth! She also asked for a box to take both of their left-overs home to her mom. It was the first and last date!
Lindsey @ Better After
February 16, 2016 at 2:00 PMHA! Oh man, that is a new one! I’m covering my mouth in horror! Her earring post?!! I’m definitely sharing this one at etiquette night!
Ann
February 16, 2016 at 1:19 PMAs a high school freshman, I was excited when a senior asked me out to pizza for my first ever date. We sat at a booth with a fairly wide table. When the pizza came, I politely reached for the spatula, scooted up in my seat, and leaned over the table to serve him the first slice. Unfortunately, I slipped forward and the pizza somehow flipped onto his white dress shirt and slow-motion slid cheese-side-down all the way to his lap. I wanted to cry, but he was nice about it. We did go out on a few more dates, but then I found out he tried to date my cousin when I was in Japan that summer.
Lindsey @ Better After
February 16, 2016 at 1:58 PMOh man, at least he was a good sport about the pizza! At my high school we were allowed to leave campus for lunch, so I’d sometimes go with my friend and her extremely cute older brother to their house for lunch. Without fail I would always do something stupid in front of him, like miss my mouth entirely with my spoon.
Just Justin
February 16, 2016 at 1:20 PMMy Worst/Best Date: I drove to the downtown of a big city with my date (1 hour). We went to a very nice restaurant. Reservations. Jacket and tie required, etc. She was very pretty. She was not shy and ordered very well. I gave the waiter my debit card, and it was declined. 🙁 I was so embarrassed. I had money in the account, but my bank thought it was stolen because of the location (city and restaurant). I had to leave her in the restaurant, find an ATM, withdraw the money, walk back, and pay the bill. The waiter was very snotty about it. My date was very gracious about it. When we went back to the vehicle (this was mid-90’s) I unlocked her door with a key and opened it for her. When I walked around the vehicle to get in, she reached over and unlocked my door for me. I knew right then, she was a keeper. I married her a few years later. We laugh about it now.
Funny Etiquette Story- I was at a super expensive steak house with a group of friends. As in every group, we had a jerkface guy. He kept one-upping others. He kept name dropping, bragging about money, and how he knew so much about fine dining. We ordered our meals and all of us ordered steaks. His steak comes and he cuts into it. He is immediately enraged. He starts explaining how his steak isn’t cooked correctly to us. he start getting loud and causing a scene. The waiter comes to the table to check on us. Jerkface starts complaining about his steak was cooked incorrectly. The waiter excuses himself and comes back with a chef. The chef pulls out a card with how a steak is supposed to look and a meat thermometer, which all verify the steak was cooked correctly. The chef excuses himself. The waiter states, “Sir, I am not sure where you usually eat steak, but this isn’t Ponderosa.” and walks off. Boom! Roasted! 🙂
We still tease him to this day.
Lindsey @ Better After
February 16, 2016 at 1:55 PMOh man, I think I know Jerkface. At a restaurant he BERATED the poor waiter for not serving fresh oysters (this was in Kansas), claimed that since the waiter didn’t know how to tell whether or not oysters are fresh, he couldn’t be trusted, so he ordered nothing but a plate of asparagus, but then ordered a $50 steak for his 9-year-old, just to show off. Everyone was in shock.
Broccoli girl
February 16, 2016 at 2:28 PMNot sure what kind of etiquette rule this falls under – don’t throw food? (And I sure hope your group knows at least that much already! )
I was on a first date with a guy at a nice restaurant (not fancy, but nice). We ordered. As we were waiting for our food, there was a pesky fly that kept buzzing both of us. We kept flailing, each of us, whenever it was buzzing our faces or our drinks. Food comes and, fortunately, the fly wasn’t annoying us any more. We start eating. The fly makes its return. To -my- food, dang it!. I go to shoo the fly away with my hand, as I had many times already, except this time there was a fork in my hand and food on the fork. The broccoli went flying and landed, thankfully!!!, next to the table of four, not on someone at the table of four. But each of them turned around to look at who threw the broccoli. (gotta say, it was a good toss. they weren’t all that close) I think my date was relatively horrified. Me? I said “Slippery little sucker,” and couldn’t stop laughing.
🙂
Mumzy
February 16, 2016 at 3:01 PMFirst of all, I LOOOVVEE this kitchen!!! Second of all, I CAN’T WAIT to read the stories!!
Mumzy
February 16, 2016 at 3:16 PMOne of my worst dates ever: My brother lined me up with this guy from his work who was divorced. He’s lonely and needs to move on. My brother had cute friends so I was pretty excited. When he came to the door, I about died. Me: 5’9″. Him: Maybe 5’5. Honestly, I could look over the top of his head. Then, I probably said 10 words all night long because he told me EVERYTHING about his ex-wife, marriage, etc. ALL NIGHT LONG!!! I feel asleep on the way home. I told my brother he needed to reconnect with his wife. It was HORRIBLE! Most boring night of my life. The next day he tells my brother what a great time he had and wanted to ask me out again. SERIOUSLY??????
Elizabeth
February 16, 2016 at 3:50 PMI was on a date at nice restaurant and we were in a group. One of the other guys had the most disgusting table manners. He poured ketchup all over his entire plate of meat and mashed potatoes then proceeded to talk and chew loudly during the entire meal. His ketchup filled, smacking mouth was so gross that I couldn’t eat my food. Then when the meal was over, a couple of the guys thought a good tip would be to clean out all of their change and bury it in a bowl filled with condiments. I was disgusted and embarrassed!
Mawia Mwendwa
February 16, 2016 at 6:50 PMMy uncle had recently been appointed to the C-Suite of an international accounting firm and when they were out for dinner at an exclusive restaurant, he was served something he couldn’t identify immediately. The cup had 2 handles and the liquid was dark and steaming so he added cream and sugar, stirred it carefully and raising the cup took a sip of the hot liquid. “Do you always add cream and sugar to your turtle soup?” was a question asked by the person across the table.
Lisa G :-)
February 18, 2016 at 6:22 AMLove this kitchen! I especially love the glass in the high cabinets, and the backsplash; is it stainless steel?
My worst date story (one of many bad dates, haha):
I met a man on line through a Christian social group; we were both single parents with a girl in the 5th or 6th grade. He wanted to meet, so I suggested we meet somewhere for ice cream. He insisted we have dinner, so we met at Red Robin with our daughters. The man had brought his bottle of water in the restaurant, and he ordered a kids’ meal for him and his daughter. My daughter also ordered a kids’ meal, and I ordered an appetizer for dinner. We all ordered water. His daughter asked for money for games, and he gave her some money; I did the same with mine. His came back several times asking for more money, and he kept giving it to her.
During dinner, he talked non-stop about how his daughter was picked on because of a physical handicap, and how he wasn’t getting any work because people “didn’t like him” (he was some sort of construction sub-contractor).
After we ate, he let the check sit for a while, then said, “I guess I’m supposed to get this, huh?!” He paid, and then we all stood up. My daughter said, “You forgot to leave a tip!!” He answered that his daughter used up the tip money playing games. I didn’t have any cash on me. My sweet daughter pulled 1/2 a pack of gum out of her pocket and left it as a tip!
I took my daughter to the nearby mall so I could withdraw some money, get some change, and go back to tip the waitress. The man followed us!! I bought everyone ice cream, then went back to the car, pulling out of the parking spot before we buckled up so he wouldn’t be able to follow me again! We drove around the mall, then went back to Red Robin and went in to give the tip to our waitress. I was so embarrassed, but she thanked us and gave my daughter a huge hug for the thoughtfulness of her tip!
Odette
February 18, 2016 at 10:34 AMBare-belly-patting man DID evolve. LOL. Thanks for all the laughs!
Nancy
February 18, 2016 at 12:27 PMMy husband and I were invited to a fancy military ball, as my husband was the honorary unit bagpiper. The attendees ranged from the newly enlisted to the senior well-decorated commanders. We were seated at a table with a range of personnel and tenure – and I was the only female. Two of the very young men obviously were good friends. One of them inhaled his salad. He turned to his friend seated across the table and said, “I know you don’t like salad, may I have yours?” I thought this odd, but chalked it up to being extremely young in a formal setting and not knowing the protocol and etiquette. Well, after the non-salad eater said sure, the hungry young man reached over the table to his friend’s salad plate and grabbed a large handful of lettuce with his bare hand and then plopped it on his plate and proceeded to eat it. His commander (seated next to me) muttered something along the lines of, “We will be having a discussion about that!” I really began to feel sorry for the young man when the commander said in a calm voice, “I do believe you owe the lady an apology for displaying just how poorly raised you are and for your total and complete lack of awareness how to act like a civilized human being.” I don’t even want to imagine what was said to this poor soldier when I was no longer present.
Hanna
February 18, 2016 at 1:02 PMI have loved reading all of these funny stories! And that kitchen? Going on my wish list for santa.
My story happened recently and I used it as a lesson for my little girls. We had friends over for dinner. We made nachos and all commented on how delicious the cheese sauce was. I looked over as we were all finishing up, to find the husband swiping the cheese off the plate with his hands and then shoving his hands in his mouth over and over agajn, sucking the cheese off. Not like a little finger, his whole hand. I had to look away so I didn’t gag! I thanked my husband for his table manners when they left!
LuRae
February 18, 2016 at 1:07 PMThe etiquette presenters show a clip from the movie “Pretty Woman” in which she is definining at an upscale restaurant. You can find the clip on YouTube.
Betsy
February 18, 2016 at 6:29 PMWhen I push the button to see comments, I only get the option to write them, not read them. I want to see what other people wrote first!
Jen Y
February 18, 2016 at 8:48 PMI’m late to the game but here are a few how to do it right stories…
My first date with my husband was a watermelon date. He to me to a secluded secular bench overlooking a fountain on our college campus. H carried out a chilled water melon & set it between us then pulled out napkins, forks & a knife out of his inside suit pocket. Lots of fun & laughter…it obviously went well.
In our first year of marriage he took me on a picnic in the middle of our first snow storm. He planned it all….he had hot soup, cheese & crackers served with hot chocolate. Served on top of a huge flat tree stump overlooking Chattanooga.
He still has fairly good manners & is an even better cook. Though our son has a different view on his manners……he grills the best baby back ribs for family celebrations. While observing him thoroughly enjoying the ribs our son comments, ‘Dad, you eat like a homeless man.’ 🙂
Michele
March 22, 2016 at 8:21 AMWaaaay late to this post, but I have to share my worst date ever. The guy picked me up and told me he’d take me on an adventure. We get in his car, and as soon as we start driving, he lets out a horrible fart. With the windows up. Very obvious. Then proceeds to pick his nose and fart nearly the whole drive to our destination (about 45 minutes away), which wouldn’t you know it, was a PORN SHOP. I was feeling ill from trying to hold my breath for most of the drive, since his flatulence didn’t let up, so when we got to the porn shop, I pretty much just stood at the entrance and let him browse. When he was done I asked him to take me home. I couldn’t even try to eat after that mortifying display of bad manners! UGH! I didn’t even WANT to see what his dinner etiquette was!
Lindsey @ Better After
March 22, 2016 at 11:22 AMHoly cow! I think you win!
Toni
December 31, 2016 at 5:50 AMWhere did you buy your cabinets from? (The ones above the older existing ones?)
Love your remodel!!!!!!
SJ
August 4, 2017 at 11:49 AMSo I was widowed at 40, after a couple of years my friends couldn’t stand it anymore started fixing me up on blind dates. The first and last was a 40 something that thought telling me he had to go to the dentist every 2 months due to a severe plaque problem!? It still makes me gag.