Ugly Lamp Contest: Round Two

Ugly Lamp Contest: Round Two
Time for Round Two! 
 Have your eyes fully recovered from the onslaught of ugliness of Round One?  
Buck up little soldier, because here comes some more:

 from Megan

Though he was able to eventually find work as a table lamp, Clancy never got over the bitter sting of being rejected as a member of the carousel, and spent his days fixing anyone who walked by with an icy glare.

from Brittany

Here’s a new twist on the classic leg lamp.  Cast your vote today!

(I really can’t imagine fumbling around in the dark trying to switch this thing on, hand running up and down the yellowing cast, blurgh!)  

from Juliette

And you thought ONE creepy baby from yesterday was bad?  How about twin zombie babies? They are coming to harvest your soul with the help of their renegade pack of zoo animals and one inappropriately seductive bunny.

from Danielle

Are you a messy crafter?  Here’s a helpful hint!  Try disguising your drips and drops of wood glue by stapling a teddy bear and some fake bees to your project and calling it “honey!”  No one will be the wiser!

from Sara and Stacy

You cannot hot glue pom-pom trim to an apple basket and call it a lampshade.  Well, I guess you can, but you can’t do that and get to call it cute.  But you know what you can call?  The fire department, when this  ill-conceived fire-hazard goes up in flames.

from Michelle

Sure, you may have heard of Thor, God of Thunder, but what about his brother Thornton, God of Protecting Yourself from Eyestrain by Using a Suitable Light Source?  He doesn’t get near enough credit.

Ugly Lamps Round Two


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  1. September 6, 2011 / 7:23 PM

    The broken leg lamp is bad, but I just don’t think anything can be worse than the deer feet from last time!

  2. September 6, 2011 / 7:23 PM

    The broken leg lamp is bad, but I just don’t think anything can be worse than the deer feet from last time!

  3. September 6, 2011 / 7:23 PM

    The broken leg lamp is bad, but I just don’t think anything can be worse than the deer feet from last time!

  4. September 6, 2011 / 7:29 PM

    That bunny on the creeptastic baby lamp looks like Burt Reynolds on a bear skin rug. EW!

  5. September 6, 2011 / 7:30 PM

    I think I may have some unresolved issues with baby-shaped lamps. Those seem to terrify me the most.

  6. September 6, 2011 / 7:36 PM

    Actually, am digging on the quasi-viking lamp.

  7. September 6, 2011 / 7:58 PM

    LMAO! Innapropriate seductive bunny. Hopefully the lady that has the masterbating bears doesn’t get upset again!!!

  8. September 6, 2011 / 8:00 PM

    the unicorn almost made me jump out of my chair — that is awesomely bad.

  9. September 6, 2011 / 8:06 PM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

  10. September 6, 2011 / 8:15 PM

    Oh man I thought that the cast one was bad. I mean have you ever been in the doctors room when they take somebody’s cast off. Uggh that smell. Then I saw the “Hey how R U doin…” Bunny & I lost it. That is too funny.

  11. September 6, 2011 / 8:29 PM

    Oh, they just keep getting better.. (or worse…??? : )
    & I am waiting for the submission of “Teddy Bear holding himself” : )
    Thanks for sharing these… good for a laugh all day long.. : )

  12. September 6, 2011 / 8:33 PM

    I voted broken foot, it makes me think of a huge germ magnet! Ewww!

  13. September 6, 2011 / 8:38 PM

    Wow, these posts are so cool! Love your hilariouse comments. I voted for the unfortunately not cast away cast this time 🙂

  14. September 6, 2011 / 8:42 PM

    You crack me up with your brilliant coments! I am going for the zombie babylamp this time. The broken leg is so horrible, I wont even call it a bad lamp.

  15. September 6, 2011 / 9:08 PM

    The cast lamp is the one that made me cringe, so that got my vote. I don’t even want to know the story behind that one!

    The little apple basket one is kind of cute, even if it is waiting for a fire to happen.

  16. September 6, 2011 / 9:30 PM

    Okay, that was way too hard to choose! They were ALL horrible! Where do people find these things?!!!!

  17. September 6, 2011 / 9:44 PM

    Fabulous!! The “inappropriately seductive bunny” made me laugh out loud.

  18. September 6, 2011 / 11:34 PM

    I’m not sure what I was laughing at more – the lamps or your comments! Had to do a double take on that “inappropriately seductive bunny”. LMAO! I still think the deer lamp from yesterday gets its though! 😉

  19. September 7, 2011 / 12:50 AM

    Oooh, it’s getting harder to choose. I had no idea there were so many really ugly lamps.

  20. September 7, 2011 / 1:40 AM

    My eyes! My eyes! Make it stop, for the love of God, make it stop!

  21. September 7, 2011 / 2:32 AM

    Ok, that unicorn gave me the chills, but the leg lamp is so much uglier. I kinda like that psuedo viking too.

  22. September 7, 2011 / 2:40 AM

    And to think that these lamps were once (or maybe still are…) proudly displayed on someone’s dresser or end table. I wonder if the same person owns both the deer lamp and the cast. (Both are a little too creepy for words.)

  23. September 7, 2011 / 3:09 AM

    I really need to stop coming to this site while I’m eating…

  24. September 7, 2011 / 3:24 AM

    Having broken my foot in January the cast lamp really struck me as THE ugliest lamp EVERRRR! I only had mine on for a week (had to be taken off cuz it was on too tight) and it STUNK big time after only that little while! This is SO gross! But there are certainly other contenders for ugliest on Round one and two. OK, so here’s the thing: We get all these horrid lamps together and burn them in a HUGE fire never to bother us again! Right? Who thinks these designs up anyway?!?!?!?! Yikes!

  25. September 7, 2011 / 3:49 AM

    I am dying laughing! I can’t get over these lamps and your commentary! BAHAHA!!!

    xoxo, Mallory

  26. September 7, 2011 / 5:22 AM

    I missed the “inappropriately seductive bunny” and had to go back up and look again…. hahahahaha creeeeeepy baby lamps! Burt Reynolds! Snort!
    The ‘cast lamp’ my first thought… when the light bulb heats up will the leg start smelling like a dirty funky cast? Seriously I gagged.

  27. September 7, 2011 / 6:28 AM

    Oh dear Jesus, where do I begin! To choose, I had to think of which one would be worse sleeping next to. It’s definitely the autographed cast. Brrr… But the Teddy with the bumblebees came might close!

  28. September 7, 2011 / 12:31 PM

    Look how the elephant is watching the bunny.

  29. September 7, 2011 / 2:22 PM

    Ug, I’m with everyone else choosing the cast lamp based on what *must* be the worst smell when the light bulb heats up. And, um … I kind of like the viking lamp. “Behold the power of my light!”

  30. September 7, 2011 / 2:23 PM

    I may be crazy, but with a new lampshade I could really love Muscular Viking as my own!

  31. September 18, 2011 / 1:55 PM

    that cast is the most disgusting thing EVER – how gross; there is all dead skin inside a cast ugh i’m nauseous. what’s next, used bandaid lamp?

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