Ugly Lamp Contest: Round One

Ugly Lamp Contest: Round One
It’s here!  The moment we’ve all been waiting for.
Ugly Lamp Contest, 2011.

Are you ready?
Oh, no.  You’ll never be ready.

Let it begin.

from Peggy

If fear and desperation had a mascot.  And someone made that mascot into a lamp.

from Katie

I wasn’t sure this slack-jawed, dead-eyed, nearly naked baby could get any creepier, then I noticed the clown necklace.

from Angela

This elegantly understated lamp will add a hint of subtle glamour to any corner of the room!
from “Name Withheld”  (yeah, it’s that bad)

“So, gunning me down in the prime of my life wasn’t enough, you had to make a LAMP with my leftover FEET?  Which you topped with a picture of a living deer, a cruel reminder of what I once was and will never be again?!  I’d be flipping you off if I had fingers.”
from Daena

Have a house guest who has overstayed their welcome?  You need the Feather Jester!  A surefire guest-repellent, plus you can use it to dust the furniture after they leave!
From Marie

What this lamp lacks in attractiveness and style, it makes up for in sheer size, standing nearly four feet tall! Plus there’s tassels!  Lots of … uh … tassels.

Ugly Lamps: Round One

sponsored by



  1. September 5, 2011 / 4:05 PM

    And the picture of the deer doesn’t have feet. Is it a “before” painting?? Poor Bambi.

  2. September 5, 2011 / 4:12 PM

    Maravilhosos os abajures,querida estou aqui o dia todo a cada postagem sua vibro e venho correndo ver não sei onde vc acha tanta coisa interessante mas seja onde for continue pois eu adoro e me inspiro em muitas coisas,bjs tenha uma linda semana,bjsssssssssss

  3. September 5, 2011 / 4:42 PM

    Wow, how wonderfully bad. Who makes these lamps? Seriously. I mean, what kind of person do you have to be to think to yourself while lamp making, “People are really going to love this saggy-pants baby. Winning.”

  4. September 5, 2011 / 4:46 PM

    I *was* eating when I started scrolling. Emphasis on was. Ewww.

  5. September 5, 2011 / 5:04 PM

    My uncle had a lamp made out of deer feet when I was growing up. I always used to sit there and pet them, LOL. Just last Christmas I asked him if he still had it, and they said if they ever found it again, they would give it to me 🙂

  6. September 5, 2011 / 5:29 PM

    Thanks for hosting this contest. I needed a good laugh this morning.
    All great entries!

  7. September 5, 2011 / 5:59 PM

    Well, THAT was just WAY to hard to decide. I think they’re all equally hideous. Though the ghetto baby has it’s own place in just downright WRONG land.

  8. September 5, 2011 / 5:59 PM

    Well, THAT was just WAY to hard to decide. I think they’re all equally hideous. Though the ghetto baby has it’s own place in just downright WRONG land.

  9. September 5, 2011 / 5:59 PM

    Well, THAT was just WAY to hard to decide. I think they’re all equally hideous. Though the ghetto baby has it’s own place in just downright WRONG land.

  10. September 5, 2011 / 6:05 PM

    If you painted the fish and changed the shade it might not be so bad.

  11. September 5, 2011 / 6:26 PM

    My husband heard me laughing and had to come see what all the fuss was about. He was as equally appalled.

  12. September 5, 2011 / 7:37 PM

    That deer lamp is truly disturbing.

  13. September 5, 2011 / 7:44 PM

    I was speechless, and then the only word I could come up with was “repulsive”. If this is only round one…wow. we are really in for it.

  14. September 5, 2011 / 8:09 PM

    The Bambi foot lamp is wrong on so many levels.

  15. September 5, 2011 / 8:42 PM

    The deer lamp… Hands down. You just have to ask yourself… What were they thinking???

  16. September 5, 2011 / 9:05 PM

    That first one made me gasp! I wasn’t prepared.

    How can they possibly keep these in their houses?

  17. September 5, 2011 / 9:22 PM

    Who in their right mind would ever buy one of these lamps or have them in their house. I could not decided which was worse the baby or the deer feet, both equally disturbing .

  18. September 5, 2011 / 9:53 PM

    I have a client who would do the deer feet….just not going to show him! Those are some really BAD lamps! So glad someone else has them!

  19. September 5, 2011 / 10:06 PM

    The only positive about the deer feet… at least they used all of him! Antler lamps and chandis are much easier to deal with because they actually fall off on their own, and the deer is still alive. 🙂 They baby? Speechless.

  20. September 5, 2011 / 10:07 PM

    You know what’s sad is that my Hubby would probably love #4 and really like #1.

  21. September 5, 2011 / 10:11 PM

    Bwahhaha! Great Round One!

  22. September 5, 2011 / 10:43 PM

    omg it’s so hard to choose just one! These are terrible!

  23. September 5, 2011 / 11:27 PM

    I haven’t laughed like that in ages. Each scroll brought a new horror !! And what made them all worse is that every single one is crooked and that alone would drive me nuts ha ha

  24. September 6, 2011 / 12:01 AM

    Rollie-Pollie Fish Heads – I am stuck with #1 as “he” lives at my house – however – I am thinking that baby is going to give my little grouper a run for his money! Thanks for hosting! FUN!

  25. September 6, 2011 / 3:58 AM

    oh, my…they were all reeeeeallly bad…

  26. September 6, 2011 / 4:25 AM

    I was going to enter a deer leg lamp, too! My boyfriend has one – and I’m stuck with it because it’s a “family heirloom.” Not even kidding.

  27. September 6, 2011 / 7:13 AM

    It´s true. We are not really prepared for this.
    Amazingly ugly! Ahahaha!

  28. September 6, 2011 / 11:01 AM

    Question on the boxes we can check, does hmmm mean you like it or aren’t sure about it?

  29. September 6, 2011 / 12:35 PM

    honestly — how do you choose between the deer feet and that freakish baby? I couldn’t decide. I think there should be two winners on this round!!

  30. September 6, 2011 / 2:05 PM

    heck, they are disgusting! I do not know which I prefer… kisses

  31. September 6, 2011 / 2:19 PM

    I have no idea how to choose the best of these fabulously horrible lamps. The baby is so creepy, yet the deer feet are so disgusting, but then jesters/clowns/cherubs all give me nightmares, and then the fish! The last lamp actually looks good by comparison.

  32. September 6, 2011 / 3:51 PM

    Wow. Someone else here said it first and said it best: I wasn’t prepared.

  33. September 6, 2011 / 4:21 PM

    These are all so horrific. It was so hard to choose which one was the most atrocious!

  34. September 6, 2011 / 5:11 PM

    I voted for the deer lamp not because its ugly but because its gross! They were all very ugly and would not know how to make any of them into Better Afters.

  35. September 6, 2011 / 6:06 PM

    could I change my vote?

    I voted for the deer feet but now that I look at the creepy baby lamp again, it’s got BEAD FRINGE on the shade.

    i think that puts it over the top.

  36. September 6, 2011 / 7:59 PM

    Who knew it could be so hard to choose??? Those are atrocious!

  37. September 6, 2011 / 9:40 PM

    Oh my!!! Those are SO bad! I have to say that your commentary makes me laugh out loud–love your blog!

  38. September 6, 2011 / 10:38 PM

    That deer lamp made my day! That is hysterical! Great gift idea for someone you don’t like!

  39. September 7, 2011 / 3:46 AM

    sick sick sick!!! Who the made these lamps!?! hahahaha!! I love this contest!!!

    xoxo, Mallory

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge